HOW HIGH ARE YOUR WALLS? CHANGING YOUR LIFE WITH WORDS - DAY 178

There are walls in and around homes, apartment buildings, businesses parks.  Those walls do not present many problems.  However, the walls we build around ourselves can be very daunting.  Almost everyone at sometime in life puts up walls to protect themselves mentally, emotionally, or even physically. The walls that we build do not shut others out but rather they shut us in which is really not very smart.

If you have internal walls to prevent you from being hurt (possibly again) or from allowing people to really get close to you and to know you, then ask yourself if you are truly benefiting from them?  I know someone who has managed to build strong and big walls to protect her emotionally and mentally from anyone coming into her life.  On the surface she is charming, attractive, very smart and vivacious and fun.  That is the side she presents to the world.  She gets along well with her business colleagues and others, but she is now 50 years old and totally alone.  She has kept everyone at arms' length for so many years that she has only a couple of friends from earlier years who live in other states so she may or may not have a telephone conversation with them a couple of times a year.  She has avoided personal relationships because of the damage done to her by two relationships when she was young and had her heart broken.

As we get older we rely more and more on our friends and family.  When our parents are gone, and if we are not close to siblings or have none, we are going to need our spouses, significant others, and friends.

Have you done anything to wall yourself off from others?  If so, think carefully about it and realize that before it is too late it is time to tell yourself daily to

SCALE MY WALLS!

DO YOU PROVOKE SIGNIFICANT CHANGE? CHANGING YOUR LIFE WITH WORDS - DAY 172

In today's world most people face difficult situations personally, professionally, financially, mentally or emotionally.  Some face difficulties in all areas, and yet some people seem to remain unscathed by the problems running rampant in our country and the world.  What are you doing about any problems you or your loved ones face?  Are you taking part in your neighborhood or community to deal with problems outside of your own?  Are you doing anything to assist in resolving the grave problems currently plaguing our nation?

Each of us can do something if we decide to do it.  Make the decision to take care of your family and help your neighborhood; attend council meetings in your community to know what is happening and how you can help. On a national level do you write your State representatives in the House and Senate?  Do you vote at every opportunity, and do you take time to actually know for whom and for what you are casting your precious vote?

We all can and should provoke significant change for the betterment of our lives and the lives of others.  It will happen when each person decides to

BE A CATALYST! 

ISN'T THERE ALWAYS A WAY? CHANGING YOUR LIFE WITH WORDS - DAY 88

What things stand in your way?  Do you believe there are obstacles that prevent you from doing what you want to do, from achieving your goals, from living up to your potential, from realizing success in all of your endeavors?  We all encounter obstacles (or what seem like obstacles to us) in the course of our lives.  Some of us find a way to overcome them by going around them, over them, under them or through them.  Some of us are unwilling to do what is really necessary to overcome obstacles, and when suggestions are offered we find reasons to not try them and continue to accept things as they are (and keep complaining about them).

Which kind of person are you?  When you encounter an obstacle do you genuinely try to find ways to go around it, over it, under it, or through it?  Be truthful with yourself.  Do yourself a favor and remember that every problem has a solution.  Realize that the seeds of solutions are actually in every problem.  Tell yourself that you can do it, and believe in yourself.

Today's message is:

BYPASS OBSTACLES!

ARE YOU THINKING OF QUITTING?

Are you in a situation, relationship, environment, health condition, job or career where things are not working out as you wish they would?  As you hoped they would? As you think they should?   Are you getting ready to give up?  Are you thinking of quitting?

Well, the truth is that giving up or quitting are things that you can always do.  There is no statute of limitations on deciding to quit!  Before you take any drastic action try to look again at the problem(s) you face and determine where you actually are in the process of solving, overcoming, or outlasting the problem?  Think of it as if it is a mountain you have started to climb.............how near are you to the top?  What do you expect to happen when you arrive at the top?  Are there any foreseeable changes about to happen which are
advantageous to you?  Are there any changes you can initiate?

Try to keep in mind the adage, "We cannot control what happens to us in life, but we can always control our attitude in dealing with what happens to us."

So today's message is:

Don't Quit Now!

Life Is What Happens While We Are Making Other Plans

The title of today's post is a saying I have often heard, but I have no idea who first coined the phrase. It really is true though, and today I am feeling it! With an old friend visiting from Chicago, gorgeous weather here in the desert and lots of plans with other friends during her ten-day visit you would think everything would be great........right? Wrong! For about the 6th time in the past 12 years I am having an attack of Vertigo. With the room spinning anytime I move my head it is like being on a never-ending amusement park ride. The spinning makes me nauseous so it is like having motion sickness only I am not going anywhere. I am missing all the fun and feeling a bit cranky about it. Then I remind myself that this too shall pass. There are so many people all over the world who have much bigger, more serious problems than my Vertigo so I need to get over myself and just wait it out. Whether you enjoy Passover or Easter or neither this weekend I send you good wishes and a reminder that we should always count our blessings. I will be the first to take my own advice because I have much for which to be thankful.

My Sympathy To The People In Ohio

There are really no words to adequately express my sorrow for the most recent high school tragedy or my sympathy for the victims and everyone who is affected by it. I am so crazy about my children that I cannot even begin to imagine the pain of losing one of them, and my heart aches for the families and friends of those who died and those who are injured. My heart also aches for the alleged shooter because something happened to him in his young life to bring him to the moment yesterday when everything went haywire. Each time I look at a baby I realize what responsibility parents have for bringing that person into the world and what power they have for molding and shaping that child's future. Parenthood is the most important job in the world, and it is also the most difficult one because babies do not come with step-by-step instructions to ensure they lead happy, productive, successful lives. They come with their own DNA, their own personalities, their own strengths, and their own weaknesses, and they will have their own experiences, joys, sorrows, and problems all of which can alter the courses of their lives. Heaven help all children and parents! My thoughts and prayers are with the people in Ohio.

Are Two Heads Really Better Than One?

There is an old saying that "two heads are better than one." Do you believe it? I do! If two heads are better than one, then dozens or hundreds or thousands must be EVEN better. Because I believe it I cannot help but wonder why we are all waiting for the government to resolve our problems. Politicians cannot stop campaigning or arguing long enough to focus on solutions and gaining consensus. I firmly believe that in every neighborhood, community, city and town of any size in America we have the capacity, the intelligence, and the ability to resolve many of our problems on local levels. Think about it! When this country was first settled people were strong, brave, resourceful, resilient, and optimistic in spite of all the odds. They were entrepreneurs (or actually the first solopreneurs even though this is a recently coined word). Whether they were farmers, blacksmiths, storekeepers, bankers, ranchers, saloon keepers, sheriffs, deputies, preachers, teachers or doctors they assessed what they and their communities needed, and they made things happen. They helped each other, and they shared with those less fortunate. Did they always agree? No. Were they always successful? No. Did they make mistakes? Yes. Did they make progress anyway? You bet they did. Did they have any of the many assets we have today such as education, communication, technology, health care, medications, transportation, etc.? No! Yet somehow they managed to create a country that was envied by the entire world, a country where people longed to come to fulfill dreams, a country where freedom existed, and a country where slavery and segregation were finally ended. We all have the ability to work together, and yet we act as if we are a flock of sheep waiting for Little Bo Peep to find us and guide us home. I am convinced that if people would come together in a spirit of unity to prioritize what the community's needs are, determine all the available resources, distinguish between what is necessary and what is desirable, and be more concerned with the good of the community than the good of the individual that ideas for solutions would flow faster than anyone could write them down. Because there are problems and there are symptoms of problems it must be agreed that problems are to be solved and symptoms will take care of themselves as a byproduct of problem solving. An unbiased, objective, fair facilitator must lead each group to ensure everyone is heard and no one is shut down even though others may disagree with what is being said. Respect and courtesy are a must. Once everyone has had a chance to contribute to the vast list of "problems" then as a group they must decide if each item is a symptom or an actual problem. Very quickly it will become clear that while there may be a jillion symptoms the actual number of problems is manageable. People get overwhelmed when they think they have to solve all the symptoms, but once problems are identified and prioritized then the formation of solutions can begin, time and action calendars developed,and individual or group responsibilities established for the actions. Call me crazy, but I know that this approach works. For what are we waiting? Let's put our heads together and do it!