FOR WHAT DO YOU CARE? CHANGING YOUR LIFE WITH WORDS -DAY 141

Do you know any children whose parents don't really care about them?  Have you met a teenager who has never known what it is like to be cared for and treated well?  A lot of kids who get into gangs are lured to join by the idea that they will have a family or people who will care about them.  Of course, they are too naive or too frightened to realize that the caring they may receive comes with a high price as more and more is demanded of them.

Do you know any people who have pets but do not provide proper care for them?  Do you know any pet owners who are actually mean to their pets?  The shelters are full of dogs whose owners did not care about them.

Do you know people who are fortunate to have jobs today but who do not care about their jobs?  Do you know people who are interested only in a paycheck and not in doing the best work they are capable of doing?

The poor quality of the labor market, the problems with bullying in schools, the large number of animals who have to be put down, the poor performance of our schools, and the ever increasing crime rates are all indicative of people not caring.  What is part of the solution?

CARE MORE!

Should You Be Honored On Mothers' Day?

Some people seem to be naturally maternal while others seem to have been standing behind the door when maternal instincts were passed out.  Do you ask yourself which type of mother you are?  The reason I pose the question as to whether or not you should be honored is because there are too many instances in the news today of women whose parenting leaves much to be desired.  Mothers are meant to nurture and care for their offspring.  Yet we see and hear many dreadful examples of women who either do not want to or are incapable of providing the love and nurturing their children need if they are to thrive and grow up  as undamaged human beings.  Our society is plagued with sociopaths, psychopaths, gang members, bullies and abused and neglected children of all ages.  Somehow it is inconceivable to me that these people grew up in loving, caring environments.  I do not believe that babies come into the world as anything except pure innocents, and we parents and other adults mold, shape, and enhance or tarnish the lives that are in store for little ones.  There are no perfect parents, but before we accept accolades on Mothers' Day and regardless of the ages of our children we should ask ourselves if we truly are worthy of being honored as mothers.  If the answer is affirmative then have a glorious day and bask in the warm affection of the family surrounding you.  If, however, the answer is negative then decide to find help to improve your parenting skills.  Ask a friend, a neighbor, a clergyman, a teacher, a doctor, or the person who is the best mother you know to help you.  All children deserve to be protected, nurtured and loved by their mothers so take any steps necessary to remedy things before passing the point of no return in your relationship.  It is a huge responsibility, but you hold your children's present lives and their futures as adults in your grasp.  Handle with care.

It Is Friday, Time Is Flying, But Enjoy The Anticipation

Today is the 16th. Hanukkuh begins on the 21st. Christmas Eve is on the 24th. New Year's Eve is on the 31st. Now I realize all of you know these dates .......so why am I writing them in this post, you ask? If you are like I am, then your to-do lists are overly ambitious and guaranteed to cause stress and anxiety as the days on the calendar go by and the hours on the clock tick louder and louder. When this happens I seem to try to kick everything into high gear and just get it all done (must have been all those years in retailing that did this to me). Well, not this year.......I have decided that I want to enjoy the anticipation of the holidays, the actual preparations for them, the shopping and baking and wrapping and decorating, the parties and music........I will not just rush to get it all done this year. Life is so fragile that we never know what can happen between these holidays and those of 2012. Slow down, take some deep breaths, kiss your children and grandchildren, turn off the lights and sit in front of your Christmas tree or your Menorah and remember what the holidays are actually about and why we acknowledge and celebrate them. Enjoy peace, tranquility, togetherness and happy memories. That is what I am going to do!!!

Reunions - Love 'em or Hate 'em

Some people I know would NEVER attend a reunion of their high school or college graduating classes. Other people I know would not miss attending any sort of reunion. Personally, I love reunions. However, I remember when I first realized that not everyone has a happy time in high school, and I felt terrible that I had not realized that when I was in school. Perhaps I could have done something, or made an effort, and encouraged others to make an effort to reach out to those that could barely tolerate being there. How naive and thoughtless of me to assume everyone felt as I did, looking forward to going to school daily, waiting for the weekends for the football games and dances and all the things that contributed to my enjoyment of high school. I graduated in a class of 656 students, and I have to say I absolutely loved high school. I certainly did not know all of my classmates, but in retrospect I regret that I was oblivious to any of them who might have been hurting or suffering for any reason. My recent blog about bullies in schools has made me think more and more about children who are not able to enjoy their school days and years because of mistreatment by others, because of feeling excluded from groups, because of not fitting in, because of not being able to dress as others do, or not coming from a great neighborhood, or coming from a troubled home where any form of abuse is occurring. Out of the 656 students in my class, I wonder now who was perhaps physically abused, sexually abused, or verbally and emotionally abused at home. There were no published statistics about those things when I was in school, and people did not talk about those subjects in front of us. That does not mean they did not happen. I was not aware of any bullies in school, but I seem to have been such a Pollyanna loving my own life that I surrounded myself with friends just like myself. In reflecting on those years there are several students whom I do remember who may have hated school, and I wish I could find them and tell them that I regret I was so oblivious that I did nothing to help them. I actually have looked for them on line but have never found them, and they have never attended any of our class reunions. No one seems to know what happened to them after high school. I comfort myself by hoping that they became extremely happy and successful adults and do not attend reunions because they felt no connection to others, but I also fear that perhaps their lives have not been happy or successful and that maybe my friends and I could have done something to change that for them. Of course, I will probably never know but it makes me want even more to encourage you to teach your children to be kind to every classmate, to include them at lunch or recess, and to stand up for them if others are mistreating them. We pass through life only once. It is not a dress rehearsal, so let's help today's children have the best beginnings possible for themselves and all the others whose lives they will touch.